This is a slightly different way to read the poems above from a single perspective. Below are 24 poems telling a single-sided story.
That Social Time
It is that time of my life again.
The time to be social and be happy,
Just to make everybody else happy.
I wouldn’t mind but,
I am the guy who is asked to make up the numbers,
To be the lame one and make everyone else feel better.
I don’t like the drinking,
Nor do I enjoy the constant noise,
But I go to these social affairs,
For the sake of keeping people happy.
I may be Happy.
If I get home before somebody vomits on me.
If there are some salted peanuts.
If my time is spent on me having fun.
If I still have some change left in my wallet by the end.
If I find a new friend or something better.
I will be happy.
Dreaming the impossible dream for me,
The outcast hoping for love but, too scared to look for it,
Hoping it will come to me,
Am I just lazy in life?
Probably, but at least everybody else is happy.
Out on the Town
Going out tonight is nothing new,
My town is my birthplace, childhood and my night out.
Like most people in this town, we stick around,
For not having anywhere else to go in this world.
Friends and Family,
Pizza and Pies,
This my town that I love and hate.
Walking in the pub and then maybe a club.
Watching the drink get devoured,
The crisps get spilled and the drunks starting to arrive,
This is definitely my town on a Friday night.
Maybe something exciting will happen tonight,
There might be a fight, or a beautiful woman could fancy me,
But that never happens in my town.
The Black Dog
My local pub where you can guarantee a good mood, is the Black Dog.
The smell of smoke and vapes surrounding the door,
The floor covered in a thin grease of an alcoholic dream.
This isn’t my comfort zone in my town.
With 1 mate losing again on the bandit,
Another trying to talk to some women,
And another playing on his phone.
I am starting to watch the clock.
I know this is supposed to be a fun night,
A good time with my mates, away from work but,
All I want to do is go home and watch some tele.
Does that make me boring or a bad friend?
Maybe the Black Dog is a comfort zone but,
Maybe I need something more exciting than the Black Dog.
But where is the more exciting place on a Friday night?
Better question, where is the more exciting place for me on a Friday night?
Not including my apartment of course.
I can think of some places but,
I don’t think they are the best ideas I have ever had.
Maybe I am just boring, maybe I enjoy the boring life?
Maybe the Black Dog is the perfect place for me? Maybe.
As soon as I turn and see her, I just knew she looked amazing.
Different seeing somebody with pale white skin,
Long black hair, in a very nice black dress.
She doesn’t happen to appear in reality, every day.
But, stood in the doorway to this little den of alcohol,
Stood this gothic beauty.
Not tall, not short.
Not thin, not thick.
This average girl looking anything but, average.
In a room full of people, she is the only person in view.
Am I staring?
She won’t be interested in me anyway so there is no point in exciting myself.
I should just focus on a good night with my mates.
But I don’t seem able to look away from her.
Is she looking at me?
My eyes are looking at her eyes and vice versa.
Is she smiling at me, this Gothic Beauty?
She starts to walk to the bar,
Or is she walking towards me?
This uncertainty is killing me,
Every step she takes cause me more discomfort.
If she is walking to the bar, do I even talk to her?
Do I dare even say a word to her?
What do I say?
What if she starts a conversation with me?
What do I say?
What will she say?
She is walking really slow?
Has time slowed down to almost a complete stop?
Why am I questioning everything?
What is the real reality?
Am I getting sweaty?
Why am I getting sweaty now?
My heart is pounding harder and harder,
I can’t even look at her,
Just in case she looks back,
It makes no sense and all the sense in the world.
Sliding into the bar stall next to me,
Her hair moves in rhythm as her head glides through the air,
Eyes shining under the lights at the bar, enchanting to behold.
In the fine details, she gets a little weird,
She doesn’t want to know my name, she doesn’t want to tell me her name.
Another mystery to this gothic beauty.
Vague details annoy me and yet, I wait upon her every word.
Although, I absolutely want to know the real woman behind the goth attire.
My friends have slowly moved away, leaving me alone with her.
Pals trying to help me by not getting between us or being a distraction
It is Incredible to me that she even wants to glance at me,
Reality doesn’t appear to be working as I am in a dream,
Even she seems to be disinterested in everybody but me.
I have only been talking to this beautiful woman for 20 minutes,
And I am already in love with her.
It is incredible really,
I so rarely talk to women like this,
And normally, they rarely want to talk to me,
So why is this beautiful woman wasting her time with me?
In fact, she is really beautiful,
Too beautiful to want to go in the Black dog on a Friday night,
Definitely too beautiful to walk in without some company,
Where are her friends, her boyfriends?
Why did this beautiful woman walk in here tonight?
I am probably thinking too hard,
Maybe I am making excuses for why somebody would want to talk to me,
Somebody who I am very attracted too.
She seems too perfect to be true.
It must be my very lucky day.
Just when I started to get comfortable,
Sitting with a beautiful lady,
Then a guy walks over and starts flirting with her.
I want to fight for her attention but,
She is miles out of my league, and he is definitely the better-looking guy.
She begins to flirt back with him,
She begins to smile more and more,
And even arranges to meet up with him next Friday night in the Black Dog,
I sit there bewildered by this as he leaves our conversation,
Winking and blinking at her as he goes.
I wave goodbye to make him feel awkward,
Although he seems to have accomplished his mission,
Not brilliantly but, he settles for next week,
She turns back to me and begins our conversation again,
It is almost as if he was never there.
I mention it and she shrugs it off,
Saying it happens and that he is the backup plan if I fail.
I did not even know I had something to pass.
Is dating just a game for this beautiful lady?
It has definitely increased the pressure on me,
I definitely don’t want to fail this game!
Lost in Words
I am speaking to her about the weirdness of the world,
Sharing my interests and she seems to be into TV shows,
I like TV too but, she seems to really enjoy talking about her favourite series.
We keep talking and time is slowly falling away,
Midnight has come and gone, and the morning has begun,
Before I know it, she has gone to the bathroom,
I check the time to see it has already gone past 2.
She takes a while and I begin to worry,
I am starting to think that she might have run away,
I might have said the wrong thing and scared her away,
It wouldn’t be the first time.
Just as I am starting to think about going home,
She appears, and I have never felt so happy.
She smiles and I can’t help but feel relieved,
I have never been so happy to see somebody before in my life.
I am in a state of disbelief,
I have heard of nights as good as this,
But I thought it was just a TV trope.
She offers me a drink at her place,
I almost can’t believe it and I ask her to repeat the question,
She grabs my hand and I haven’t been this excited in years.
Her hand is smooth, strong and cold.
It feels different to all of my ex’s,
As she parades me out of the Black Dog and into the night.
I try to act as calm as possible,
Trying to play it cool and confident,
But I don’t think I am being very successful.
She has become more animated,
A lot more joyful,
Visibly excited and flirtatious.
Dancing in the darkness of the night whilst I stroll by her side,
Hand in hand,
She is leading my way to the future.
She is so awesome,
I really don’t want to ruin this night,
I am just trying to go with the flow.
She is just too cool and unpredictable,
I don’t have a clue what she will do in the next second,
Never mind the rest of the night,
A Tango under the streetlights,
Trying to lift each other as high as the sky,
Making each other laugh,
Her kissing me out of nowhere.
She is just really awesome,
I am just trying to keep up with her,
But she is in a whole other league than any other woman,
I have ever met,
And definitely me.
Shining through the Night
Tonight, is a clear and cold night,
The crescent moon barely shining in the sky,
The dull streetlights allowing me to see her face,
Shining above her black dress,
Her pale skin reflecting the little amount of light around her,
Shining in the dark world around her.
Her eyes are intoxicating to my point of view,
I get a little buzz in my gut every time she looks straight into my eyes,
I can feel and see her emotions shining through the dark.
Slowly, the urban area around us is fading,
The streetlights are becoming more infrequent,
As the darkness grows on a dark night’s sky,
The countryside is becoming more and more prominent,
The trees swaying in the breeze as we continue to adventure into the dark,
I didn’t realise how far away she lived.
A Different Idea
Walking in the dark is always fun with good company,
But I didn’t expect this offer to include walking for seemingly miles.
I make her the same offer she made me at the bar,
Just with my house as the final destination,
Which she refuses by saying we are nearly there.
Those words excite and also or terrify me,
What if she judges me as irrelevant?
And ditches me in the middle of nowhere?
I trust her but, who truly knows the mind of a stranger?
Maybe she finally realises that she is miles out of my league,
There are plenty of better men in the world,
Or that she may not want me inside her home.
There are millions off reasons,
Why this night might not end the way I want it to,
But I hope my best desires,
Do not prevent a good night for both of us.
The Devil is in the Details
Spending more and more time with her,
Helps me understand more about her,
Every word enlightens me on her morals, nature, and personality.
Weirdly, there seems to be two personalities to her soul
A gothic creature of the night that loves the darkness
Never flinching at the noises coming from the night’s sky.
Then you have this sweet but, flirtatious princess looking for some fun,
She is complicated and I definitely want to know more about her.
Yet I love the mystery of the goth and therefore I am a hypocrite,
Only I could want the mystery and the secrets revealed at the same time.
Ultimately, she is just an enigma.
Reality will dawn upon me soon but, I want to stay in this dream.
By the time we walk through the next village, my legs are starting to ache,
Looking into the darkness shows nothing,
Only she seems to exist with her constant energy keeping me on this road,
One moment I want to laugh, to be funny, to be caring, to be romantic.
Dreams of women didn’t prepare me, to keep up with this Gothic Princess.
Behind Closed Doors
You never know what might be going on behind closed doors.
The typical saying is ringing inside my head as I see her door.
Butterflies in my gut, telling me that this is a bad idea,
But when I look into her eyes, and she smiles,
I can see why I am nervous, because of the woman I am next too.
The red door seems so normal,
But for all I know, there could be anything behind that door,
A giant tentacle monster!
I have never been so tentative to watch somebody unlock a door.
The silver key within her grasp, inserted into the door,
With every creak and knock, my heart skips a beat.
Then there is a snap, the key is slowly pulled out of the door,
And the door slowly opens, and the darkness invites us in.
As she opened the door,
The warm air inside seems to hit the cold of the night,
The smell of candles is prevalent.
I offer ladies first and she offers men just before.
I take my first step inside,
My hair seems to be standing on end,
Goosebumps running up and down my arm,
It feels weird stepping into the darkness of her home.
I expected something a little gothic,
But I didn’t expect this level of steam punk goth,
It is truly just her house.
She lights a few candles,
And turns on some electric torches,
To show more of the house to me,
Hidden by the darkness beforehand,
I don’t know what to say or to do.
The Gothic Palace
This place is a little weird,
I can see she is a bit gothic but, this is a modern lair,
Electronics and the modern furniture mixed with little oddities,
Darker colours surround this room,
She seems to fit in this room perfectly,
The chair in the corner seems to be her perfect throne.
She is looking at me,
Is she waiting for me to say something?
What do I say? What can I say? What would be good to say?
It seems to be a great gothic home.
For a strange girl,
Okay, a beautiful gothic princess’s palace.
Every palace needs its princess and she seems perfect for this palace.
Inside the Mind
I never imagined this gothic princess in front of me,
To like the same TV show as me,
I definitely didn’t think she would be into animated TV shows,
I don’t know what I expected her to watch,
Probably supernatural TV shows with Vampires, Zombies and Werewolves,
Not magic princess’s and Sci Fi madness.
Not that I am complaining,
The fact that we connect on this feels a little weird,
Like our souls are linked or she is inside my mind.
I want to look at her history of watching TV,
See what else she enjoys, beyond a couple of cartoons,
But going into her private info, even her watch history seems wrong,
Especially as she invited me to her place,
And is being just awesome in every way.
It is like this all a dream,
There is a reality TV show crew lurking in the shadows,
Waiting to jump out and prank me.
But just seeing her face puts me at ease,
Her genuine interest in me is causing me to feel happy,
For what feels like the first time in months.
The Throne in the Corner
As I sit in her throne,
She reappears from the kitchen,
With a drink in hand, placing it across the room.
She walks slowly towards me,
Memories of hours ago start flooding back,
Except there is truly just the two of us in this room.
As she starts sitting on the arm of the chair,
Laying upon it as she moves her hand closer to my face,
Her fingers gliding across my cheek.
Slowly her head moves towards mine,
Her eyes piercing my soul,
Without a word, our lips lock.
Her hands continue to move me closer to her,
Moving through my hair, across my face,
Massaging my neck and shoulder.
She seems to be completely lost in the moment,
And I want to be fully lost with her,
But I can’t,
I don’t deserve her.
The Nice Guy
I am not the sporty jock,
I am not into Anime or a serious gamer,
I don’t have a particular hobby or passion,
I’m intelligent enough to go to university,
Not intelligent enough to be a Doctor.
Average is often a word I describe myself,
I am a bit ugly and funny and a bit self-conscious,
But I like to please people, especially people I like.
The woman in front of me is definitely somebody I like,
I am scared that I won’t make this woman happy.
There are so many ways to let this goth princess down,
I decide to be more of an open book,
And share some of my secrets, my failings.
This is almost to let her go free,
To not be dissatisfied with me,
To not pity me but, let her find somebody who may be a better man for her.
Somebody who does not have an illness riddled past,
A man who knows what a woman wants intimately,
A prince for this princess.
Therefore, I am being the nice guy by letting her be free of my burden,
Maybe it will free my soul from my own mental prison,
An opportunity to let us both go free by being honest.
When I told her more about my past,
I didn’t expect her to feel so, emotionally about it.
A very expressive goth that has shown her soul for hours,
Is shocked when I decide to share more personal information?
I know that Goths have a complicated emotional balance but,
I didn’t expect her to go quiet, and be less receptive,
It is almost as if she is jealous,
That I can share such information with her but, she can’t do the same.
I can see that she has something to say,
But is biting her tongue, refusing herself to tell me.
Am I secretly jealous that I don’t know as much about her,
And that is still my fault.
I should just be happy that I am currently sat in a beautiful princess’s house,
Having a better night than I could have ever imagined,
But I my honesty is getting the better of me,
Or is it loyalty to be kind, and not deceive anyone.
Belief of the Impossible
Why do I trust what I am hearing?
How can anybody be a Vampire?
Why do I have so many questions?
Part of me wants to run away as far as I can,
Another wants to laugh and pretend this is not real,
And the other wants to help here and listen to her.
I know she has pale skin,
And her canines are look pretty long,
But how can vampires actually exist.
Wait, if she is a vampire,
Has she just been interested in me for my blood?
Does she even like me for being me?
She is looking at me different now,
Am I getting used?
Am I just her dinner?
I have got to get out of here!
Fight or Delight
“No please let me go,
I don’t want to be just another victim, PLEASE!”
Ah, I can feel her teeth, like needles in my neck,
It’s a weird pain, sore and yet it is not as bad as I thought.
Her body is forcing mine down as she lays upon me,
Her legs twisting and wrapping around my own,
With her cold hands on my head and arm, holding me in position,
As she twitches and slithers, seemingly enjoying me.
I am trapped in this fatal position,
I cannot overpower her now.
I can hear her sipping, slurping and feasting on my neck,
As I gasp and ache beneath her,
I can smell her even more now she is so much closer,
This aroma is intoxicating.
I can almost taste my own blood or what I imagine it tastes like,
In the back of my throat.
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see her long black hair,
Covering her face from view,
I just want to see her pale face again but, I can’t move to see her.
I hope I don’t taste bad and that it is making her happy.
It feels weird, I just feel her, I just feel tired,
“Please stop, please, I’m dying, I just want to see your face, please.”
“You are still so beautiful, my love…”
The Taste of Eternity
I am so tired
Why am I in pain?
What is this taste?
What am I tasting?
I can’t see it but, I can taste it
Taste this weird drink.
It tastes like nothing I have ever tasted before.
A mixture of chocolate and meat in a drink.
No, it tastes more like salty popcorn and beef gravy.
I can’t describe it.
Why am I drinking it?
It feels good.
It tastes good.
I feel weird
Is she saving me,
Please save me.
I am so weak.
Make me stronger.
Please… I love you…
To go to the next section of this book, Perspective of M, click here.
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